Celebrating?

If you read my post entitled Bring It!!!!!!  before Christmas, you would be aware of my good news.  So am I celebrating.  Well, I am happy, but there are two things that are playing on my mind that are keeping the champagne safely locked away in the fridge.

I am happy because it is the news that I wanted and I worked hard to get.  But it is by no means a fait de compli.  I still have to consult with the doctors and they do have power to veto and I still have a couple of tests to complete and they are fairly important.

Also, there is the fact that if I am accepted into the program it won't be a picnic.  I will be in for three really hard months.  I have a week of high dose chemotherapy which will be used to destroy all my immune system.  It will do this by wiping out all the white blood cells in my body.  That kind of process cannot exactly make one feel all peaches and cream.

So I don't want to get ahead of myself.  These days I am forever conscious of my mental health and either situation I find myself in (and it will be one or the other) will challenge me in this area.  I have to be extremely aware of this right now, because if I am not it could really come back to haunt me later.

However, I don't want to just surround myself in doom and gloom.  I'm not doing this for the negative.  I am doing this for the positive.  I also have to think about the reasons why I am doing it, and that is for the benefits that I will receive a year from now and beyond.  To go for a run, to play with my kids in the back yard, to play sports, get and stay fit, to walk bare feet, to arrest the nerve pain etc, etc.

Well that's it from me for now, until next time, stay well:)