I Feel Great!

I have just finished updating my mood on patients like me and I have been surprised to find that my last five entries have all been 'good'. www.patientslikeme.com is a great website for people with chronic ailments, especially when it comes to mental health. I will review it in more detail in a later blog, but I want to focus on the mood mapping. It allows you to rate your mood on a scale of one to five (one being bad and five being great). It is fairly crude, but a great early warning system for your mental health. Oh, I hear you asking what is a rating of good. Basically, good is four out of five.

Now I have touched on my mood being good in previous posts, but I have to say I was surprised, and I did not realise that the decrease in the number of stresses would be so profound. Don't get me wrong, the stress from the impending surgery is massive! But just having one stress to deal with is so much easier. I really feel that I am learning a big lesson here, and it is a great one to learn for future management of my own mental health. As of yet I haven't figured out how to apply this new found knowledge, but when I do I will be sure to let you know. One thing for certain is that it will be a process.

So, other than the trivial day to day tasks, my main focus is on the surgery. But that is nothing new, I have told you all this already. I have told you where exactly my concerns and anxieties lie, but I haven't told you how this is making me feel. This is probably because I am not sure. Yes, there is a strong level of anxiety and worry, but there are also a bunch of emotions that are thrown in the mix, some of which I didn't even know existed. I would say I am definitely experiencing mixed emotions.

So far, the best I can come up with is that I am at a crossroads of my life. Something is going to happen on Friday, and there could be a number of different outcomes. Each potential outcome has a different emotion associated with it, so my feelings are changing with each new thought. However, I think that half of the ease of the situation is that there is nothing that I can do about it. It will be what it will be, so all I can do is wait, enjoy my family and friends and try and have some fun. I've gotta say, I have really loved the last three days with my family. Until next time, stay well:)