And now, the MRI!

OK, OK, OK.... I'll get to the MRI in a minute, but first I just noticed that over 50 people had viewed my profile! Woo Hoo! I can't believe that people are actually reading it, but as I said before, I feel I have a lot to say that people may find informative and interesting and as a reader, I hope you do. Unfortunately, nobody has left any feedback so I don't know for sure. So please, feel free to tell me what you think. Positive or negative, I promise I won't take it down unless it is offensive or completely off topic. If you don't feel like giving feedback, you might want to simply tick one of my new reaction boxes to help give me an idea.

So, on to the MRI (aka. magnetic resonance imaging). Firstly, I was a little grumpy that morning as I had to fast because they wanted to sedate me for the MRI. So if you happened to cross paths with me on the way to the hospital I apologise for any beeping, swearing or rude hand gestures you might have received. Anyway, just before 9.00am I arrived at my location which felt more like the entrance to an apartment block than a hospital. I made my way up to the MRI reception, and then out it came. The form. If you have essential tremor, or just about any other movement disorder for that matter, you will understand my loathing for forms, and there multitude of annoying questions like have you had any surgery in the last six months and what medications are you on? FYI, they want more info than just 'yes' and 'lots'.

After the form, the wait started before I was taken to a change room where I was asked to change into a pair of pyjamas that would send a fashionista into shock, and then for good measure, another wait until finally I was marched into the MRI room which looked almost exactly the same as it would in any respectable medical drama. Then I thought "Am I in Grey's anatomy?" Since the neither the nurse or the technician look like the sort to have sex in a supply room, I guessed not.

Once in the room, they asked me to lie down on the bed. They put some headphones on me as the MRI is quite loud and I could also listen to music, then they fastened my head in place and then put a grill over my face that made me feel like Hannibal Lector. That's when it hit me. I felt my pulse rate rise and my hands clam up, because for the first time I really felt that my surgery was not something I would do in the future, but it was imminent and close.

They put a blanket over me because it was quite cool in the MRI room, and as they slid me in I felt the sedative start to work and I fell asleep for the duration of the scan. After which I got up, got dressed and my wife drove me home. So, have I reflected on those feelings of imminent surgery? Yes, I have. I think it is important to address these issues sooner rather than later, but have I figured them out yet? Not completely. I think the first thing I recognise is that these emotions are perfectly natural for someone in my position. Now I just need to understand and control them so I have a constructive outcome. Until next time, stay well:)