Monday, May 17, 2010

Stimulated and Turned On!

I hope you all enjoyed the video in my last blog. I'm sorry I didn't get it up sooner, but I had trouble getting blogger to let me upload it. Anyway it's up now and I hope you enjoy it. I think that the last thirty seconds are the best.

So it has now been three days since my stimulator was turned on, and I have really been on a bit of an emotional roller coaster in that time. When my neurologist, Dr Richard Peppard first turned on the stimulator I felt like laughing. I had almost talked myself into thinking that it was never going to happen. The good doctor was supposed to turn up at 10.00am, then this turned to 11.00am and after that time came and went he finally turned up at 1.30pm. So at this time I was thinking we would get this show on the road straight away, but no, there was ten minutes of testing. But finally, with a sudden surprise he turned the stimulator on my right side only and I stopped shaking.

So why did I feel like laughing? I don't really know. In a way it made the last ten years seem like one sick practical joke at my expense, and now that it just ended all I could do was laugh along. In another way it felt like a great magic trick that was so amazing all you could do was laugh.

After the laughing passed and I had a second to really take stock of what was going on I was surprised not to feel overjoyed or elated. No, there was no jumping over the moon here. There was simply a feeling of relief or calm. It was the lifting of a burden or like the feeling you get when you finally squash that mosquito that has been buzzing in your ear for 20 minutes, just a thousand times worse, and now I had found peace.

Dr Peppard then set up the left hand side, the results you can see for yourself in the last post I made. After the doctor left I thought I'd be ringing everyone I knew to let them know about the successful surgery, but no. I simply sat there enjoying the stillness sipping a glass of water, a simple task that only minutes before had seemed like a much more difficult ordeal. Next post I'll talk about how I have felt coping with the side effect and what my expectations are for it for the future. Until then, stay well:)

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